Body Neutrality, Is It The New Body Love?

As published in Who Magazine on 16 February 2023

Ask a woman what she hates about her body and she'll answer quickly and with a list a mile long. Ask that same woman what she loves about her body and she'll pause and have to think about it. Women have been conditioned since they're born that the most interesting and important thing about them is how they look. Friends and family will tell little girls how pretty they are rather than how smart or strong they are. There are billion dollar industries, including weight loss, beauty and fashion, that feed on our insecurities to sell us their products. And I was no different, I too hated my fat body and tried diets, lotions and potions to try and "fix" it. 

Thankfully things are slowly starting to change. There has been a rise in the Body Love movement, seeking to empower women to love their bodies exactly as they are now. Women like Taryn Brumfitt, Celeste Barber, Sonya Renee Taylor and Lizzo are shining a light on the systems that lead to women hating their bodies. They are showing women that there is a different way to think about your body and that it can be positive. 

What is Body Neutrality?
For many women jumping from loathing their bodies to loving it can be a massive leap. It seems impossible, like trying to jump over the Grand Canyon. But what if there was a mid point? A landing pad to aim for in the middle of canyon that looks far more achievable? This mid point is Body Neutrality. Body Neutrality is when you can look at yourself in the mirror and there is no hate, no love, just "this is my body" and "this is what it looks like". You view your body as an instrument that allows you to live this life, rather than as an art work just to be admired. 

How do I change my perspective?
Moving through the spectrum of your feelings about your body from Body Hate to Body Neutrality is a slow and deliberate action. It takes effort to undo decades of learning that your worth comes from how you look rather than any aspect of your personality. However, it is absolutely possible because I did it. Here are some exercises that helped me on my way to Body Neutrality. 

Try to notice each time you are criticising a part of your body, stop yourself and try to turn it into something positive. Change "I hate my muffin top" to "I have the softest, smoothest skin on my belly" or from "my arms are so flabby" to "I can lift my grocery bags into the car because I have these arms". 

At least once a day, express gratitude for your body. This body is the only body you are going to get in this lifetime and so often we forget to be grateful for it and all that it allows us to do because we have THIS body. It can be for anything, "I'm grateful for my legs because I could go for a walk today " or "I'm grateful for my hands because it means I can type " or "I'm grateful for my bum because I'm comfy when I sit down".

Find an embodiment practice that works for you. For me it was Qoya, a free dance embodiment class. There is no wrong way to do Qoya. You move your body in whatever way you want and it helps you to find the joy in movement for the sake of movement rather than for any other purpose. It helps you to feel into your body and to dance with your feelings rather than thinking about them. You start to gain a new appreciation for your body and all that it can do. If dance is not your thing, try yoga, bush walking or roller skating. It doesn't matter what your chosen activity is, it's about feeling into your body and realising how wonderful it is. 

Once you achieve Body Neutrality, I urge you to keep going on towards Body Love. You're already half way there! 

Liz Reichard runs Sunranges Qoya to help women to realise their inner strength, power and wisdom through the embodied free dance practice of Qoya. To try Qoya for free, sign up to her newsletter at www.sunrangesqoya.com.au.

Try this exercise

• Grab a pen, piece of paper and your phone. 
• Pick a part of your body that you like least. 
• Put your phone's timer on for 1 minute. During that minute, write down everything you don't like about your chosen body part. When the timer goes off STOP! 
• Put your timer on for another minute and write down everything you like about and are grateful for this part of your body. What can you do, or have you done, because you have this body part? How does your skin look and feel? Once your timer goes off stop. 
• Reflect on how do you feel about this part of your body now.